Talk about.. erhh, actually i don't have much to say, not feeling too sad, not feeling too happy either. Probably that's why after six days i still don't have a single thing to either brag or whine about.
But only now i realized i missed doing something monthly. And it's...
My August Summary
1. I finally finished my brother's super overdued wedding ceremony, could have been sooner if i wasn't grumpy and selfish back then, still wondered what if i didn't start making videos, would there still be a video to edit, or just pictures to be posted on Facebook? Would there still be friends like i'm having now if i didn't create WHIC? Would i have spent more time on other things that i need to tend to, i need to practice or focus on?
Not sure, but life always leave us a lot of "What ifs" because there's only one decision we can make given one time. But as always, making a lot of wrong decisions in turn right decisions becomes so invaluable to me. Truth is though, i don't know when have i made right decisions until it's known results are clear to me.
2. I visited my cousin's newly born son in a hospital at Damansara, it was my first time looking at a two-days old baby, so tiny yet so precious to even look at. Makes me think about having children myself, wondering how am suppose to raise a child, who am i going to have the child with etc.. Ever since Form 5 and so on, i've always ever so often to think how i can be a father that my children can look up to, which is something teenagers don't usually think too far about. Babies are truly cute little fragile things.
3. Went to Penang, that's probably my last time ever sulking over past love. On the first day, you can imagine how emotional i could be since i listened to music through my phone the whole day long. What a silly day it was. Not really one of my best trips with my family, one reason would be that i overeat every meal, part of me blames my eldest brother for having two stomach which he can eat every three hours and can still eat a lot. But what can i say, besides eating and shopping what can you do? Not very much except for the beach where you have to go if you are always on the search for food.
4. My two front teeth were something that always bothered me, i'm always cautious about smiling too big or they will show, why? Well, ever since i was in my teenage years, my teeth wasn't properly taken care of, adding to the fact my two front teeth were permanently stained in some parts, i could've care less about brushing my teeth since that stain will never come off, untill just recently. Yeah, i finally got my teeth examined and repaired my stained teeth, you don't know how happy i am to finally be able to smile and not look like i haven't brush my teeth for years. Brushed my teeth 3-4 times a day now.
5. Too it took two months, but i finally got used to living with family and myself. Not much activity with friends since either no one has started one or completely impossible to get together in such circumstances for everyone. We live too far apart is not an issue, just that we have our own lives and things to care for too. At first i hated hearing this excuses but then i realized i'm in some way different. Since i abandoned friends from my hometown, things went back like when i was in Form 1 to 3, when friends was not in quantity but in quality. But the thing is, when you jump in to that pool called Pool of Friendship, you're going to get frustrated of soaking in too much, then you rise up a little, to get a relaxing feeling, it is when you are with friends you are most comfortable, but then you eventually have to get out of that pool, leaving with you just your wet dripping body.
That's why for me, friends were even more precious when i start to lose.. no, "lose" is too harsh, maybe we're just not contacting and meeting each other as much as before. Still, i wished that Malacca trip lasted forever, doesn't matter if it didn't went well or not, most of us were together and i realized spending time together was so precious, something we take for granted when we think spending time at college is already quite alright. Well, what if we went on our separate ways afterwards? Some goes to HELP, some goes to UK. Different class schedule times, different continents. What's the solution then? Either we all make an effort to stay together, or just call me over obsessive or "no life".
It's always something i have to question yet still have faith in my friends. What am i to you, now?
I hope whoever reads this, will not change but criticize me. Some people value less on friends and more to their lovers, some don't. That's why you should ask yourself, is being friendly to anyone you meet, becomes a friend automatically, or friends that you are comfortable with and will always spend time with, given every opportunity available? If you're the former, well, i think you probably had hurt a lot of people by saying or portraying something like "you're a good friend and i will always be your friend", and then later saying it to the next 20 people or so and have to equally spend time with all of them.
6. Currently don't have a best and close friend if i quite frankly say, thought i had some but momentary i guess. Maybe i just haven't met one, but if i do, we'll be the best buds of our lives if not the whole world. What i consider to be best buds? Well, someone like a brother but also a friend, sticks with the code bros before hoes, sacrifices for each other with no mindset of gaining anything and always have time for each other, even if we had girlfriends or wives. Always letting and giving is something i like to consider an important factor, because that's how true friendship will surely last forever which will eventually lead to trust and honor.
You probably thinking i'm choosy but then again, think about what i said. If we were really best buds or something close to it, will you be doubting me after reading this? Ask yourself why some friends don't last that long or hasn't always been close, that pretty much filter up a lot for me, and i mean so much that i might have think i made the wrong choice.
7. And after this post, i have to conclude my research on the subject "True Friendship" which i feel that further dissection of it is not necessary to obtain true friendship because now i have my own definition of the word "friend"; i just need to wait for "when".
For the people that has read thus far, thanks a bunch, i like you, just because you went through all that for me.
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