It's funny how life always find something to freaking annoy the hell out of you.
There are people who are stressed out by common things, which are either work or study. I have neither of those for now because I've always have been an easy-going guy.
But for some reason life gives you one to stress about.
The number one stressful thing in my life is society; fitting in, considerate, commitment, politeness, honesty and that crap I try to follow as best I can. But then there's people who doesn't have such a sense of righteousness or have single care for it.
I thought life would be a bit better, moving to a new life, but for some reason the past life follows me every where. This life isn't new, I know the feel of it, only it had gotten worse.
The most frustrating part of my life now is not being able to make new friends. Is it because I don't have a camera in hand or is it because this is who I really am?
I've always been quiet, not to point of being mute but still alright. Paranoia sets in here; do people think I'm unsocial because of it? Do they think I'm intimidating? Do they find me revolting in some way?
Let me start as to who lives in my flat, there's a total of 8 people in one section, 4 rooms divided by the kitchen in the middle. On my side, there's a chinese girl from China, a couple from M'sia, a guy from Poland. They are all quite ok people, the chinese girl mostly stays in her room or is somewhere else other than in the flat. The couple is likely rich, almost always travels during the weekends. The polish guy is pretty much like the chinese girl.
The freaking problem people are on the other side of the flat, this may or may not include all of them but I can guarantee you it's always from there. One main thing I can say is, they are all Malaysians, who doesn't sleep late at night, first problem because they invite people (who are also Malaysians). I don't know whether or not they have been drinking or they are sober but they freaking noisy out in the kitchen, just to mention the rooms aren't sound proof. Noises include, singing terribly, doing terrible accents, laughing loudly, playing music and more recently, watching movie and playing the guitar (one of them bought it).
THESE ARE MALAYSIANS. One look at the opposite block from ours, you see NO ONE in the kitchen and are generally Caucasians. What does that indicate? In my opinion, this is just setting a bad example to our people. I'm definitely certain the polish guy who lives next to me suffers the problem too, albeit less annoying since I'm the one living next to the kitchen.
This is not their home, it's a collection of different people with different lifestyles living in the same household. There must be a freaking limit to what you can do at a set a period of time, a compromise between each other. Do I need to spell out what is EXPECTED for people to consider in such circumstances or is it not OBVIOUS enough to notice what you are doing affects others adversely? Are people that ignorant or are they really just idiots of society?
We're in our 20s already, and this is the level of maturity and responsibility we Malaysians exhibit. Quite honestly I'm not even sure if they any real goals in their lives.
Moving on...
I've been asked or invited about this, which is about travelling to other places.
I like to remind myself and every other people who hasn't contemplated about it, is that we came here for a purpose, to study.
Easiest to counter argue this is that we have to enjoy ourselves too.
'Enjoyment' is a subjective matter, ladies and gentlemen. Because it is different for everyone.
Although travelling is generally what most people want to do, I'm not in the general category.
My enjoyment does not require me to travel in cars, trains or planes.
The internet is the simplest gateway to my enjoyment, Most of my entertainment derives from it, movies, cartoons, shows, animes, games, books, socialising etc. the list goes on.
More common activities I like doing is, writing/reading/singing/dancing/painting/gaming.
If I have to travel, I would only enjoy it if I had good company or somewhere I really wanted to go. I don't have good company because people who invite me are couples, and I don't to be a freaking light bulb. Second reason I don't have good company is because they ignore me, simple as that. You'd think only people who don't know much about it would be such persons but no, I don't want to be naming people although I want to, but what is the point really, what happened has happened.
I have places I want to go but not now, which comes to my next point. There is a balance between studying and playing. This 'balance' is also different for each people, smarter persons require less to study and more time to have fun, vice versa. I'm the kind of guy who wants to be prepared throughout the term regardless if I'm good or not. Too much fun induces guilt inside of me and I hate that feeling.
That said, I hate people telling me I'm unsocial or 'am wasting my free time staying here'.
Why can't stay here for most of my term? I freaking like Aberystwyth, everything is within a walking distance to get and obtain, why the hell do I want to sit for hours in the train to go shopping. To be honest, I'm not a suburban kind of guy even though I live near KL. I love the the peace and quiet of my home and the simple town that is Rawang, it's only now that it's starting to expand bigger. Aberystwyth reminds me of my home because of it's simplistic lifestyle. The only difference is that I'm here all alone. Nevertheless I just want to get used to Aberystwyth, it's a place that I want to stay, ignore the annoying flatmates for just this point.
I'm 'unsocial' not because I am, it's because view me as one. As far as I know, there's not a lot of people with my interests in life, people just don't see that I like living this way. Except for my family, no one gets me, let alone people who just know me.
Leading to where I talk about this girl who totally ignores me halfway when chatting in FB, we've never talked in real life beforehand (same course, same university). This is the first time someone who just abruptly stops, talking to me. I've always been myself when I chat online because there's no pressure in time to respond. Better yet, she was the one who initiated to talk, whilst I just subsequently initiated a SINGLE chat on the following day.
What's interesting is the days afterward, for your information she often comes to our flat's kitchen to hangout with the people on the other side from mine. I'm practically a ghost to her. As I'm typing this I am reminded there is another girl in the gang who ignored me too but since she always have been and I'm not interested in a person who likes drinking, for some reason I don't like her.
Anyways, so as being a ghost which can manipulate objects, she ignores me entirely, like we don't know each other or never talked to each other. This has continued since then and we've never chatted on FB.
Moving on to people ignoring me, it's like when I'm in the kitchen, I feel like I'm not suppose to be there by these people.
Well, whenever this happens I've always wanted to scream out loud to them that I F*CKING LIVE HERE, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE. I mean come on people, I'm not a freeloader, I paid to stay here and I will use the kitchen room however I like. In fact this people that ignores me, DOESN'T even live in the flat, it's people who were invited by 'them'. Tell me, doesn't this make you want to scream the top of your lungs?
It just makes me want to make a seriously epic facepalm to myself.
In the end, when I look at my situation from a third person perspective, I'm the only one who's making myself suffer, it's all psychological really. What I've always been trying to do is think of these people as friends, but you know what, it's easier to just see them as strangers since they treat me like a stranger. The difference here is merely that we're strangers living together.
So for whatever they have done that has affected me, I could easily say this in return, in very simple derogatory terms, although less equal in value:
"F*ck you, too."
There are people who are stressed out by common things, which are either work or study. I have neither of those for now because I've always have been an easy-going guy.
But for some reason life gives you one to stress about.
The number one stressful thing in my life is society; fitting in, considerate, commitment, politeness, honesty and that crap I try to follow as best I can. But then there's people who doesn't have such a sense of righteousness or have single care for it.
I thought life would be a bit better, moving to a new life, but for some reason the past life follows me every where. This life isn't new, I know the feel of it, only it had gotten worse.
The most frustrating part of my life now is not being able to make new friends. Is it because I don't have a camera in hand or is it because this is who I really am?
I've always been quiet, not to point of being mute but still alright. Paranoia sets in here; do people think I'm unsocial because of it? Do they think I'm intimidating? Do they find me revolting in some way?
Let me start as to who lives in my flat, there's a total of 8 people in one section, 4 rooms divided by the kitchen in the middle. On my side, there's a chinese girl from China, a couple from M'sia, a guy from Poland. They are all quite ok people, the chinese girl mostly stays in her room or is somewhere else other than in the flat. The couple is likely rich, almost always travels during the weekends. The polish guy is pretty much like the chinese girl.
The freaking problem people are on the other side of the flat, this may or may not include all of them but I can guarantee you it's always from there. One main thing I can say is, they are all Malaysians, who doesn't sleep late at night, first problem because they invite people (who are also Malaysians). I don't know whether or not they have been drinking or they are sober but they freaking noisy out in the kitchen, just to mention the rooms aren't sound proof. Noises include, singing terribly, doing terrible accents, laughing loudly, playing music and more recently, watching movie and playing the guitar (one of them bought it).
THESE ARE MALAYSIANS. One look at the opposite block from ours, you see NO ONE in the kitchen and are generally Caucasians. What does that indicate? In my opinion, this is just setting a bad example to our people. I'm definitely certain the polish guy who lives next to me suffers the problem too, albeit less annoying since I'm the one living next to the kitchen.
This is not their home, it's a collection of different people with different lifestyles living in the same household. There must be a freaking limit to what you can do at a set a period of time, a compromise between each other. Do I need to spell out what is EXPECTED for people to consider in such circumstances or is it not OBVIOUS enough to notice what you are doing affects others adversely? Are people that ignorant or are they really just idiots of society?
We're in our 20s already, and this is the level of maturity and responsibility we Malaysians exhibit. Quite honestly I'm not even sure if they any real goals in their lives.
Moving on...
I've been asked or invited about this, which is about travelling to other places.
I like to remind myself and every other people who hasn't contemplated about it, is that we came here for a purpose, to study.
Easiest to counter argue this is that we have to enjoy ourselves too.
'Enjoyment' is a subjective matter, ladies and gentlemen. Because it is different for everyone.
Although travelling is generally what most people want to do, I'm not in the general category.
My enjoyment does not require me to travel in cars, trains or planes.
The internet is the simplest gateway to my enjoyment, Most of my entertainment derives from it, movies, cartoons, shows, animes, games, books, socialising etc. the list goes on.
More common activities I like doing is, writing/reading/singing/dancing/painting/gaming.
If I have to travel, I would only enjoy it if I had good company or somewhere I really wanted to go. I don't have good company because people who invite me are couples, and I don't to be a freaking light bulb. Second reason I don't have good company is because they ignore me, simple as that. You'd think only people who don't know much about it would be such persons but no, I don't want to be naming people although I want to, but what is the point really, what happened has happened.
I have places I want to go but not now, which comes to my next point. There is a balance between studying and playing. This 'balance' is also different for each people, smarter persons require less to study and more time to have fun, vice versa. I'm the kind of guy who wants to be prepared throughout the term regardless if I'm good or not. Too much fun induces guilt inside of me and I hate that feeling.
That said, I hate people telling me I'm unsocial or 'am wasting my free time staying here'.
Why can't stay here for most of my term? I freaking like Aberystwyth, everything is within a walking distance to get and obtain, why the hell do I want to sit for hours in the train to go shopping. To be honest, I'm not a suburban kind of guy even though I live near KL. I love the the peace and quiet of my home and the simple town that is Rawang, it's only now that it's starting to expand bigger. Aberystwyth reminds me of my home because of it's simplistic lifestyle. The only difference is that I'm here all alone. Nevertheless I just want to get used to Aberystwyth, it's a place that I want to stay, ignore the annoying flatmates for just this point.
I'm 'unsocial' not because I am, it's because view me as one. As far as I know, there's not a lot of people with my interests in life, people just don't see that I like living this way. Except for my family, no one gets me, let alone people who just know me.
Leading to where I talk about this girl who totally ignores me halfway when chatting in FB, we've never talked in real life beforehand (same course, same university). This is the first time someone who just abruptly stops, talking to me. I've always been myself when I chat online because there's no pressure in time to respond. Better yet, she was the one who initiated to talk, whilst I just subsequently initiated a SINGLE chat on the following day.
What's interesting is the days afterward, for your information she often comes to our flat's kitchen to hangout with the people on the other side from mine. I'm practically a ghost to her. As I'm typing this I am reminded there is another girl in the gang who ignored me too but since she always have been and I'm not interested in a person who likes drinking, for some reason I don't like her.
Anyways, so as being a ghost which can manipulate objects, she ignores me entirely, like we don't know each other or never talked to each other. This has continued since then and we've never chatted on FB.
Moving on to people ignoring me, it's like when I'm in the kitchen, I feel like I'm not suppose to be there by these people.
Well, whenever this happens I've always wanted to scream out loud to them that I F*CKING LIVE HERE, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE. I mean come on people, I'm not a freeloader, I paid to stay here and I will use the kitchen room however I like. In fact this people that ignores me, DOESN'T even live in the flat, it's people who were invited by 'them'. Tell me, doesn't this make you want to scream the top of your lungs?
It just makes me want to make a seriously epic facepalm to myself.
In the end, when I look at my situation from a third person perspective, I'm the only one who's making myself suffer, it's all psychological really. What I've always been trying to do is think of these people as friends, but you know what, it's easier to just see them as strangers since they treat me like a stranger. The difference here is merely that we're strangers living together.
So for whatever they have done that has affected me, I could easily say this in return, in very simple derogatory terms, although less equal in value:
"F*ck you, too."
No comments:
Post a Comment